Dix’s Failure In Need of Political Viagra

What a week!  I may have to do more than one post this week just to cover the litany of major news stories that came out of the Obama Administration and then all hell breaks loose in the Iowa Republican Senate Caucus.  So let’s focus on that for today shall we?

In a stunning revelation, a subordinate of Ed Failure, Jr., Kirsten Anderson who is the now former communications director in the office of Senate Republican Leader Bill Dix, was terminated after repeated claims of a hostile work environment rife with sexual harassment.  Wait a minute.  Sexual harassment in a work environment supervised by Ed Failure, Jr.?!?!  Say it isn’t so!  Now I hope you caught my sarcasm there.  A certain gnome with a golden luster on this very blog warned Sen. Dix that this would not only be a possible problem, but was just a matter of time till Failure brought his tenure as Senate GOP Leader to an embarrassing demise.  In a bit of irony, Failure stated to the press, “Sexual harassment has not and will not be tolerated under the leadership of Bill Dix.”  That sound you hear is the collective church giggles from every skirt in the capitol rotunda.  That’s right, I said skirt.  Sexual harassment is the theme here.  Stay with me.

Anderson made the claims on WHO TV’s “The Insiders” over the weekend and you can watch her interview here.

This is what we politicos call a career killer.  After what happened with his highly publicized “resignation” from Iowans For Tax Relief, Failure’s political capital at the capitol was somewhere between life support and this:

Can you believe this guy was contemplating a run for governor in 2009?  I can’t wait to see the comments on this story from Mrs. Ed Failure, Jr.  (The new one).

In unrelated news, did you see that former Democratic Vice Presidential nominee, John Edwards had his law license reinstated?  Perhaps he would like to replace Failure in Dix’s office just as a precaution to avoid any further embarrassing sexual harassment related scandals.  Just a thought.

State Auditor Mary Mosiman

Governor Terry Branstad has seemed to have been on my shit list as of late given my coverage last week.  Here’s the deal, I tell it like it is and don’t sugar coat it for partisan purposes.  I believe others call it “Straight Talk”.  Everybody loved it when our now former State Auditor David Vaudt would call out then Republican Speaker of the Iowa House, Christopher Rants for funny budgeting numbers and spending too much.  When Branstad goes off the reservation and makes bad decisions either in governance of the state or politically I will call him on it.  Today is no exception.  Said Governor has an obsession with picking who gets to run for office and telling others to stay out of it.  Not only does he think he is the King, but he thinks all candidates need to be female.  While I can appreciate the value of Republican women like Governor Nikki Haley for example, just being female is not the trump card in selecting the best candidate.  He pushed Joy Corning, Almo Hawkins, Debi Durham, Brenna Finley, Kim Reynolds and now Joni Ernst down our throats with little success.  By the way, the Lt. Governor is said to be super pissed at me for doing a story that forced her out of the senate race before she got in.  She claimed I trashed her by my innuendos and implied scandals.  I did not.  I said they were unsubstantiated.  If I was trying to be a jerk and subliminal I would use this picture. 

Enter Branstad’s selection for Iowa’s State Auditor which came a week late by the way since Vaudt’s last day was May 3^rd.    Surprise, he picked a female.  Current Deputy Secretary of State, Mary Mosiman is the former Story County Auditor and a solid choice.  Not my choice, but a safe one for the Governor because she is female most importantly and won’t rock the boat by questioning ANYTHING the Governor wants.  In any event, congratulations to State Auditor Mosiman.  God speed.

GREAT MENTIONS & TRIAL BALLOONS

After last Friday’s Lincoln Day Dinner in Cedar Rapids, some in the media have all but nominated Rand Paul as the GOP nominee in 2016, which begs the question; who then will Ron Paul endorse? We know it will never be the nominee of the GOP.  And the next morning Sen. Paul spoke at the Johnson County Breakfast in North Liberty.  I’m sure the location’s name was purely coincidence.

Speaker of the House John Boehner called for the full repeal of Obamacare the same week U.S. Senate hopeful Matt Whitaker said to the Des Moines Register that we need to keep it.  No, really.

Current Iowa Utilities Board member Swati Dandekar is said to have made the decision to run for Congress in the 1st District.  Cedar Rapids City Council member Monica Vernon is also said to be jumping into the race.

Lastly it was a really rough week for me.  There was a whole mistaken identity mishap that I would rather not go into too much detail but I’m sure some of you saw this on the news.

Branstad Wins The Triple Crown Royal

Governor Branstad is having a really bad month and needs a drink.  I suggest Triple Crown Royal and no, don’t ask your L.G. for it.  Forget the Kentucky Derby, this month’s Triple Crown winner is the longest serving governor in the history of mankind.  First his Lieutenant Governor, Kim Reynolds is forced out of a probable bid for senate after a lack of support and “inevitability” perception as Branstad’s hand-picked candidate.  And then there were the ugly family values rumors.  This would be the Preakness. 

Then his Director of the Economic Development Authority, Debi Durham was exposed for having spent $73,000 in one year on travel and expenses.  First class domestic air travel and 5 Star hotel stays is always a tough pill to swallow when explaining them to the media and voters.  Now, if she is traveling overseas then a business class ticket is perfectly justifiable or if she wants to upgrade a domestic flight seat with her frequent flier miles or pay the difference, no problem.  That isn’t what she did and the Governor looked silly getting so steamed in her defense.   I’m not quite ready to say that a resignation is called for, but now that I’m nearing the end of the sentence I’d say I’m to the point where I would say enough time has gone by to think about it and a resignation from Durham is needed.  Branstad wins the Belmont. 

Lastly, State Auditor David Vaudt announced over a month ago that he was stepping down and the Governor was put on notice that he has to come up with a replacement of his choosing.  The governor likes nothing better than hand picking candidates himself (Reynolds, Ernst etc.) so why is it that Auditor Vaudt’s last day in office was this past Friday and we are still without a replacement?  My choice to continue Vaudt’s superb legacy is none other than his Chief of Staff for the last 9 years, Bernardo Granwehr who has steadfastly run that office so well.  Clearly, the Governor does not think the office is in bad hands under Granwehr’s watch or he would have gotten his shit together and named someone else to Vaudt’s position by now.  And now Branstad has won the Kentucky Derby if you will and The Triple Crown. 

The Paulbots are foaming at the mouth about Kentucky Senator Rand Paul’s visit to Iowa on May 10^th for the Lincoln Day Dinner and have been pulling out all the stops trying to get him in front of as many groups of likely caucus voters as possible, shamelessly I might add.  There is no denying that conspiracy theories are the foundation of the Mothership’s ideology, whether it is claiming 9-11 was an inside job or that the drug war is just an attempt to thwart their love of hemp fueled textiles and clothing industry.  So it should come as no surprise that they have concocted one of their own once again for selfish purposes at the expense of the GOP. 

You may have noticed that when Iowa GOP Chairman, Ashley Spiker hasn’t been giddy as a schoolgirl over Rand Paul’s presidential campaign, he has been either touting himself as a candidate for U.S. Senate or pushing for a crowded primary.  Spiker to his credit understands that he cannot win a GOP statewide primary after the disarray and plight of the Iowa GOP under his occupation so he needs as many people to jump in as possible.  Why?  Spiker knows that his only hope of ever getting elected is while the members of the Mothership have a stranglehold on the party’s caucus to convention pracoess.  The Libertards may only constitute 6-8% of our party, but every single one of them is a delegate to the state GOP convention which is why we are in the current organizational, financial and ideological mess.

Great Mentions & Trial Balloons

Steve King announced he is not running for U.S. Senate.  Well it is about fracking time!  No more attention from me.  None.

Perennial candidate Steve Rathje’s new tv ad a full 14 months before the primary in 2014 is up and I have a few observations after you watch it below:

First, the Wounded Warrior pitch as part of his campaign ad is in bad taste.  I would expect a call from them Mr. Rathje if they ever hear about it or watch basic cable in Eastern Iowa.  Secondly, in Rathje’s testimonial he makes two errors.  He is not looking at the camera and why the hell does he need to splice it 10 times?  Can he not read a sentence to the camera without 10 breaks?  It is recorded for crying out loud, you just do another take.  Lastly, Rathje seems to have a complex about never having served our country in uniform like oh say Speaker Kraig Paulsen for example.  So wrapping your candidacy and your website in the flag only draws attention to that point.  If you are going to mislead primary voters about your non-service record and mooch support off of those people actually respect and admire, I suggest you make this your new headshot:

The Rathje Campaign’s Oregon Trail of Tears

I keep promising myself that I won’t talk about Steve Rathje’s latest silly campaign for congress anymore, but then like the Catholic Mafia in The Godfather Part III, he pulls me back in.  Some of the things that come out of that campaign are so ridiculous that I just can’t let them go and not rib them a little bit.  Ok a lot.  I laugh at the things he brags about and does to promote himself to the point that I and others get teary-eyed.  I’m starting to believe that “the man who will never go to congress unless Facebook is made into a district” won’t even be able to pull that off at this point.

Yesterday, the Rathje for Congress peeps put out a website that cost them to the tune of $3,600 to produce.  I know, right?  The floodgates quickly opened for criticism and most everyone took a gander to see what all the fuss was about.  They soon saw the WHITE ON BLACK FONT IN ALL CAPS and began to get cross-eyed from the delirium that the universally recognized hardest format to read copy caused.  It is so God awful that Rathje himself was prompted to post a disclaimer on his campaign headquarters (FACEBOOK) suggesting that the aforementioned web vomit was merely a placeholder and was still under construction.  Well why in the name of all that is holy did you make the site live?  Am I being punk’d right now?  The website is so bad that I am convinced it was constructed on an Apple IIe.  The only saving grace for Rathje’s webmaster would be if he could play Oregon Trail on it.

Not to be outdone by mere social media air balls, Rathje is up on television with a campaign ad.  I shit you not.  He has a small cable buy running on Fox News a full 14 months before the primary.  Maybe in his next ad he can show his business as the backdrop instead of somebody else’s like he did in 2010.  My crack team of interns in the Capitol Complex Garden research department (ok, they are just House and Senate Pages) have an unconfirmed preliminary lead from a source who wishes to remain anonymous that this is Rathje’s alleged front for his business.

At this point Mr. Rathje, the more you campaign, the more Vegas loves the field to win the GOP nomination instead of you.

The 1st CD Race. We Can Do Better

Steve Rathje recently found this during a roadside cleanup. It fell from a Republican after learning he was running again.

The 1^st congressional district is the most interesting in the state right now with there being an open seat vacated by Bruce Braley to seek the open senate seat.   When I look at the announced candidates thus far it reminds me of how Beverly Hills Cop III must have happened.  You know a couple of low rent financiers, a well known franchise and no real plan or script for success and a rush to judgment.  That pretty much sums up failed candidates Rod Blum x1, Steve Rathje x3 and Pat Murphy who lost the Iowa House majority to the GOP.  These candidates have left their respective parties (whatever Blum is) wanting a candidate who is viable and can win.

Two “Draft” campaigns have started up in an attempt to prod alternatives to the current candidates.  One is for Republican State Representative Walt Rogers and the other for current Iowa Utilities Board member, Swati Dandekar.  Neither campaign is connected to the actual people but rather by people unimpressed with the current crop of candidates.  I do not believe the field is anywhere near set so far out from primary day.  With field-clearing potential candidates like Cedar Rapids Mayor Ron Corbett, Speaker of the House Kraig Paulsen and former Cedar Rapids Mayor and Secretary of State Paul Pate still waiting to pull the trigger, this race is no longer newsworthy till one of them gets in.

Speaking of the declared candidates, Rod Blum of Dubuque has yet to file a financial disclosure report with the FEC.  That means he has either not raised/spent $5,000 despite his candidacy being announced over a month ago or he is about to get in trouble with the Federal Elections Commission.  Mike Thayer of the Coralville Courier has a nice write up about it here.

The Iowa Democrat Party has a website up that is meant to take shots at Rep. Steve King titled “Why Steve King Won’t Run”.  It is just a list of quotes from King intended to make him look unelectable.  I went through the list and found most of them spot on and quite funny actually.  Any remarks made in defense of Todd Akin were clearly stupid however.  Regardless, the reason Steve King won’t run is because he cannot win and can be a congressman for life in that district if he so chooses.  I for one am sick and tired of King holding our party hostage while he soaks up the attention.  Rep. King used to be my favorite member of congress, but no more.

Great Mentions & Trial Balloons

David Young, Chief of Staff to Iowa’s VERY senior Senator Chuck Grassley is said to be weighing a bid to fill the vacant U.S. Senate seat.  I had heard rumblings about this but did not want to believe it till I saw Kevin Hall report it too yesterday.  There are two bits of advice I want to share with Mr. Young before he makes a decision.  First, you should encourage your boss to retire and then run for his seat possibly.  Grassley has been in office too long and frankly it embarrasses me as a Republican anytime a farmer gets elected to public office and becomes a multi-millionaire and plans to die in office.  See, now I’m getting mad and I do not wish to be.  Secondly, I strongly suggest that you talk to Governors Doug Gross and David Oman as well as Congressmen John Norris and Kim Schmett.  They were all Chiefs of Staff who thought they could fill their boss’s shoes or win a federal election.

MAIL CALL!

It is that time again where I answer your mail from the home office in Princeton, Illinois.  Ok, not really since 99.4% of the correspondence I get is email.  Again, I paraphrase the questions as I get multiple versions on the exact same topic and I don’t have time to respond to everybody individually.  So let’s get started.

GNOME:  Whenever people stop reading or I get bored.  I keep waiting for my stat count to level off but it hasn’t yet.  In fact, last Monday’s post about the senate primary was my highest read ever and 3x the regular weekly number of site hits.

Q:  Are you going to attend the Lincoln Day Dinner with Sen. Rand Paul?

GNOME:  Yes and I’ll wear a name tag that says “HELLO My Name is Don’t email me any more stupid questions.”

Q:  Why didn’t you post the list of endorsements that the Rathje for Congress campaign emailed you? 

GNOME:  For starters, it was not entirely accurate.  He lists people as the “founder of the Kirkwood College Republicans in 2009” when they have been in existence since before I went to college 25 years ago.  And then he lists Leon Mosley as “Past Chair, Republican Party of Iowa”.  Two things on that one;  He was never the Chair and I don’t think he wants to remind people of how he traveled the state campaigning for U.S. Senate with Mosley turning in the mileage to be reimbursed by RPI.  And lastly, I have been very clear about not regurgitating press releases.  Send those to a news outlet like TheIowaRepublican.com.  This is a blog.

Q:  Who the hell is Jodi Ernst?

GNOME:  Google says she is a State Senator.  In Iowa.

Q:  Why didn’t you congratulate Secretary of State Matt Schultz on the birth of his 5^th child?

GNOME:  Honestly, I think that the news factor of that was covered elsewhere at length, but you are right, he is to be congratulated.  I think I may have glossed it over because it reminded me of the opportunity cost I paid when I started having kids back in the day.  You know things like disposable income and road head became a thing of the past.

Q:  If Steve King shocks the world and actually jumps into the senate primary, who do you like to fill his seat?

GNOME:  I don’t have a favorite yet, but I like Sen. Bill Anderson’s chances.  I’d like to see him as Senate Majority Leader first and providing he shitcans Ed Failure, Jr. he would likely win my support.

Q:   Your bio says you went to Cornell College and are originally from Springfield.  And of course there are no “Capitol Complex Gardens” where you claim to currently reside.

GNOME:  Really?  This again?  I will tell my REAL home address and REAL identity to anyone who can locate the physical location of Steve Rathje’s business.  Happy hunting!

Q:  What are your thoughts about the Draft Swati Dandekar for congress movement?

GNOME:  For which party?  While I believe she would be a strong general election candidate, she would never in a million years make it out of a Democrat primary.  Here is just a taste of the pushback her candidacy would bring via Under, The Red Beret. 

Q:  Who is going to run for Secretary of State on the GOP side if Schultz runs for senate?

GNOME:  I’ve heard two names mentioned in the past couple days.  The first is Schultz’s chief deputy and former Iowa State wrestling legend, Jim Gibbons.  The other is a no brainer and that is former SOS Paul Pate, but I think that is wishful thinking on behalf of some in Des Moines.  Pate is said to be running for Congress in the 1^st District.  At least I think so.

Q:  Do you think Reynolds should run for senate or stay with Branstad?

GNOME:  Ok, this question came in before yesterday’s announcement but is worthy of a response since it is not only timely but also the question I got asked most.   I think she made a good decision to opt out and frankly my post on Monday was intended to help her along in figuring that out.  Another 4 years as Branstad’s LT. Gov is more experience under her belt needed to be a credible candidate to succeed him as Governor.  It also is 4 more years of being driven by a State Trooper and puts those DUIs further in the rear view mirror.  Time heals all wounds.  And she will still be hot in my book.

Schultz vs Reynolds Senate Primary?!

My vast network of gnome correspondents has supplied me with ample intel on the Iowa Senate race.  It won’t surprise anyone to learn that King is not nor has he ever had any intention of running statewide.  With that said. The names of potential wannabe candidates has been longer than my…. well let’s just say the list is long.

Lieutenant Governor, Kim Reynolds has often been mentioned as a candidate providing King opts out of a bid.  She is said to be ready to announce the minute King makes his decision on his attention whore non-campaign campaign that has gotten on everybody’s nerves.  I have learned that Reynolds may have a difficult path to the nomination with the addition of Secretary of State Matt Schultz making it known in the donor community that he intends to take on Congressman Bruce Braley for the seat being vacated by Sen. Tom Harkin.  Both Reynolds and Schultz are in their first terms as statewide office holders but they are in fact statewide office holders which is something Braley cannot claim and may never be able to.  It is down to these two Republicans.

Schultz and Reynolds will no doubt be in a race to announce sooner than the other to add pressure on whoever is slow to pull the trigger.  Neither is likely to poke Steve King in the eye by announcing prior to his inevitable decision to not run himself.  Both candidates would kill to have his backing though neither is likely to get it as while he may be a proud supporter of the 2^nd Amendment he is very gun shy about primary endorsements.

A Schultz-Reynolds primary matchup is interesting on many levels, but perhaps the most would be in the inside baseball drama that cannot be avoided.  For instance, Lt. Gov Reynolds’ daughter Jen Fagan currently is employed by Secretary Schultz in his office.  And then Sen. Grassley is widely known to hate Reynolds’ advisor Nick Ryan for his rampant attack ads against his grandson Rep. Pat Grassley.  While Iowa’s senior Senator may raise tons of cash for his re-election campaign and not known for helping other Republicans on the ticket, his ire and vindictiveness when crossing his namesake cannot be understated.  I supported Annette Sweeney over Patrick Grassley when they were redistricted together so I’m sure the Senator is not a fan of mine either.  Ryan may also be pushing Reynolds to run so that he can pick her replacement as Governor Branstad’s running mate, a shrewd move

As for the advantages and disadvantages of both Reynolds and Schultz, let’s start with Lt. Gov Reynolds.  She is a rising female star in the Iowa GOP having been elected as Branstad’s heir apparent and chair of the Republican National Convention in Tampa.  She would no doubt have Branstad’s backing in a primary with Schultz or anyone else and be able to tap into his donor network in Iowa.  And let’s not forget that she is VERY easy on the eyes. 

The challenges a Reynolds candidacy would likely face are some issues that were overlooked or downright ignored in 2010 as the #2 on the ticket.  She has a couple of very problematic drunk driving convictions and is untested as a statewide candidate in her own right.  There are also unsubstantiated rumors swirling around the rotunda about family values mistakes.  It is always unfortunate when a candidate is forced to prove a negative in politics and her enemies may push this button which I think would be an error of judgment to do so.

Iowa’s young Secretary of State, Matt Schultz is undoubtedly a rising star in the Iowa GOP and is recognized nationally for his efforts to clean up our elections with a photo ID requirement that makes Democratic campaign operatives’ blood boil.  A father of 5 children and the only statewide Republican office holder to endorse a presidential candidate prior to the Iowa Caucus, Schultz is a conservative who is not afraid to take a stand on what he believes to be right.  As a Mormon, Schultz is a boy scout so even Sen. Gronstal can look on Iowa courts online for years and never see his name.  Additionally, Schultz has proven that he can win statewide with literally no money in his own right. 

Schultz’s challenges are likely going to be fundraising in Iowa if Reynolds runs.  The Branstad establishment would be formidable but then Branstad is not the one on the primary ballot, Reynolds is.  The other major issue is his vacating the office of Secretary of State which Republicans haven’t held since Paul Pate in the late 90’s.  Schultz would be all but handing the office to Obama political hack, Brad Anderson to open the floodgates for Democrat election shenanigans to go virtually unchecked.

All in all this race will be very interesting and keep young political staffers gainfully employed till the 2016 Iowa Caucus providing we still have one and the Paulbots don’t scare every candidate not named Rand out of participating.

Speaking of the Paulistinian Liberty Organization (PLO), the Boston bombers were killed and captured thankfully by the brave men and women in uniform.  I could rant endlessly about how stupid the Iowa GOP responded, but Kevin Hall summed it up perfectly yesterday.  Yes, I just hyperlinked my biggest fan.  What I really want to know, is Rand Paul going to filibuster until privately owned store front surveillance cameras are banned after violating the liberty of the Boston bombers?  I am thankful for those cameras which led to the capture of the terrorists, but then I care about the life, liberty and pursuit of happiness of those affected by the bombs more than the Mothership does.

Great Mentions & Trial Balloons

Ok, the revelation of a Schultz-Reynolds Senate primary is about as big of a GM & TB as I could get but here are a few small tidbits.

Perennial candidate, Steve Rathje who is currently running again for congress in Iowa’s 1^st District has finally gotten his FEC report in. I was not even going to comment on this story till I read the seemingly endless Facebook and LinkedIn posts by him patting himself on the back for his allegedly impressive cash haul in just 4 weeks.  Breaking down the numbers Rathje has raised $51,506 mostly from people also named Rathje.  $15,600 of that total is money that can only be used in the general election for which he will likely never see.  That leaves him with only $31,082 raised for the primary.  Of that, Rathje has already spent $20,423 leaving him with $15,482 cash on hand for the primary.  There are two words I have for Mr. Rathje:  Burn & Rate.

No word yet on Liberty candidate Rod Blum of Dubuque’s cash haul as he did not become a candidate till April and therefore is not yet required to make a financial disclosure with the FEC.  I just hope he knows that coins made of tin foil do not need to be reported.